I tried using a deep voice early on in the project, but I think that this sounds a lot more natural (although I fear it still has a touch of 'girl comedian talking in a deep voice for humourous effect' going on). I don't know the difference between a bass singer and a baritone, but I've always loved the voices of singers like Brad Roberts (Crash Test Dummies), Elijah Allman (Deadsy) and now, thanks to Coco's influence, Stephin Merritt (The Magnetic Fields).
Lyrically, I really like dropping 'sudoku' out of nowhere. Not only does it keep this song from being 'same old same old' outta me, but it also helps trivialize problems a little bit, if you choose to read it that way. For some people, lots of seemingly important problems are trivial; it might not feel that way when you're tightly wrapped up in them, but they really are.
Otherwise, I think the rest of the song (the 'pep talk') was influenced by Kat's comments last week about why people create music - thanks Kat!
Which seems like a pretty good segue, if you ask me ;)
I think there are about 3 big, possibly interconnected, reasons why I make music: drive, esteem, connection.
Drive: you know that feeling you get when you've been working seemingly forever without a break, and all you do when you get home is chores? I get a touch of that feeling when I've gone too long without making music. Regardless of whether things in my life are going great at the time, or not so great. That desire, that drive, does well up on its own, and giving in to it just starts the endorphins a-flowin'. After reading that article I linked to last week, I suspect that some of this drive is also satisfied from playing games like Rock Band - but now we're drifting into 'playing' vs. 'creating' (and while I think that creating can satisfy the playing urge, and vice-versa, it's an exploration I'm not that interested in at the moment).
Esteem: I believe this is a big one for me, and I'm sure that it must at least partially feed into Drive.
When I played music live with Jill as Kitty Smack, I got a huge ego boost from feeling like I was living a secret life, like I had an alternate ego - like a superhero. If life or work seemed dull, I could always glean some satisfaction from feeling like I was part of something underground and cool, that I had a whole creative aspect in my secret world. Having grown up identifying myself as a nerd, having fantasies of self-esteem through comic books and music is a fairly routine process, I think. A comfort thing.
I think music-making also used to be a substitution for other things I couldn't have. I never really dreamed about playing huge stadiums, but when I was younger, I did use to fantasize that someday, somewhere, young lovers would be young loving to my music. Not to inspire it, but just to be in the background. Weird, I know, but it was a big thing for a long time; I think I was associating music with 'living,' the way young, romantic, inspired people do.
And another reason: I'd be lying if I said I didn't like attention :)
Connection: not as strong as the previous two, but connected a bit with esteem, I think. If something's bothering me and I manage to express it in a song, I like if someone's able to tell me they've felt that way too. Just nice to make a connection.
Another one I just thought of, that goes along with this: to make someone cry. That'd be awesome. No, really. I mean it. Call it sadistic if you like, I'll own up to it. Yeah. Cry real tears.
Now, there may be a 4th option here, as well, only I think it's connected with the three above: legacy. I'm not really scared of dying, so much as I'm scared of being forgotten. That part bothers me. Part of me thinks that if I leave enough music behind me, then part of me will still exist into the future, and people will care about who I was.
Which is pretty futile, when you think about it. How many young people these days don't even know who David Bowie is any more? And that's with fame already attached. Me, I can make a bunch of mp3's, give them away on the internet for a little while. A few people download them. After I'm gone, those songs will eventually get cleaned off of whatever servers they were on, and then that'll be it. No trace of me. My only hope would be some CBC Music Archives project or something, at best.
And any form of recognition during your time, even! I'm grateful that home recording has become such that almost anyone can do it. But that makes it that much harder for anything to stand out, too :) In popular music these days, try thinking of an 'idol' act like there used to be. Where's the modern-day equivalent of The Rolling Stones, a Morrissey, a Bob Dylan, a Madonna, a Radiohead? Bands like Death Cab for Cutie, or Deadsy, or The Birthday Massacre, or The Postal Service are larger-than-life icons for me, but chances are, they mean very little to you - simply because you have your own idols, separate than mine.
(heh...remember what I said at the beginning about seemingly important problems being trivial? This is probably a good example ;)
"Loss and pain are here to be with you again.
You will find these trials grow bigger in your mind.
Inflating
Expanding
Engrossing
Demanding
Like an expert
Sudoku
Work through it
I know you
Can."
