As the project was drawing to a close and I had more and more songs to work with, I toyed with the idea of producing a cd and playing in a show to promote it. Then I chickened out. Then I thought about giving all proceeds (not just net profit) to a local charity. Then I chickened out again. Then I told the fine folks at the middle audio forums my plans; a little bit of encouragement goes a long way, and here we are!
Above, you can see that I'm showing off some preliminary album artwork by Lisa Freeze. Because I think it's awesome. Saturday, February 20th - 52 days from this, New Year's Eve 2009 - will mark the release of a cd with all 52 tracks on it. Here are some reasons to buy it, even if you've already heard every song on the site here:
- It will only cost you $5.20 - that's only 10 cents a song! (In today's downloady age, if you're willing to pay $1 for a song that you like, and there's 52 songs on this cd, the odds are in your favour of getting yourself a bargain!)
- the entire $5.20 of your money will be donated to the Saint John Animal Rescue League. Any supplies and materials to make the cd, come out of my own pocket.
- There will be a new track order, to capitalize on the strengths and weaknesses of certain songs (they'll still be named so that you can rearrange and play them in chronological order, if you're into that).
- a few tracks will be cleaned up (as much as I want to leave all my mistakes in, there are a few tracks that have static going through them that shouldn't; the only reason it's in there at all was because I didn't find the master faders in my software until late in the project...if it's such a quick and simple fix, I feel like I can get away with it).
- in addition to the hand-made packaging, your cd will be one in a limited run of only 52; I'll be displaying a checklist of numbers that have already been claimed by people. Email me in advance (chrisleblanc79 at gmail) if you'd like to claim one for February 20th! To help promote the cd and get the word out there (because I seriously don't want to be left with a pile of 40 or 50 cds burning a hole in my self-esteem!), Dan Chamberlain is helping me to set up a show at Sunstar Lounge, Saturday night, February 20th. I'll be providing more details as they become finalized, but it's shaping up to look like a solo electronic showcase, if that's something that interests you! And if it doesn't: c'mon out anyway. C'mon, it'll be fun!
Anyway: keep watching this space for more details as they become available. I also still plan on posting a few articles here about what I thought of the project, some thanks, and some spotlights on other people out there that have done the '52' thing before.
I may have had better songs, but I've never had a 52nd song of the year before. So that has to count for something :)
As promised a few weeks ago, I tried getting drunk and doing this song all in one session. Didn't quite work out as planned; I did get slightly buzzed on absinthe one night, with the lights off and a full moon reflecting off the freshly-fallen snow on the trees outside. This produced the jangly guitar line and half the lyrics. I had some more absinthe and finished it off tonight, but I didn't really get drunk either night, so nothing all that weird.
Thanks, reflections, and a spotlight on other '52' artists to come, along with rumours of a cd and a show a little later! Stay tuned!
"This is my last song
So I don't want to get this wrong
You must know how I feel
By now
A fracture and a bond
I suspected all along
Nobody's wrong
But me
Can someone draw this picture
Of daylight on the trees
'cus this is what you mean to me
One last chance to say I love you
So let me get this right
You're the fire in my cold winter night
Here it is, part 3 of my little 'trifecta.' As you can see, all I did was mix elements of songs 49 and 50 together to make 51. The impetus for doing this was to give myself a little bit of a break near the holidays, but I think I ended up with one of my stronger-sounding tracks. I don't necessarily love the tune itself all that much, but I believe the song sounds a lot 'stronger' than previous efforts - that is, there's just a lot more going on, and in different places, which is what I'd like to be able to write more of.
So when I started writing 49, I also recorded some of the synth lines from 50, kind of working ahead on 51, but then I muted all the electronic tracks and just finished making a straight-ahead guitar tune for 49. For 50, I just muted the guitar tracks, and added more electronic parts to what I already had to make a new song. 51 took the original song I started working on for 49, and then added all the embellishments that I made coming up with 49 and 50. I may just have to try this technique again in the future :)
"That was a darker time, up until I met you
(Where did I go on a wind that won't blow)
Robotic response in kind, warmer than a virtue
(And it's starting to show, fly as high as a crow)
These simple words at night, helping you to pull through
(I'm not on my own, temperature flow)
Artificial as a satellite, no less of a world view
(Now it's starting to snow, barometer's low)
That was a darker time, up until I met you
(In those darker times)
Robotic response in kind, warmer than a virtue
(Your words felt so kind)
These simple words at night, helping you to pull through
(Helped me sleep at night)
Artificial as a satellite, no less of a world view
(In my old satellite)
Where did I go
Where did I go
Where did I go
Where did I go
Drums from the Triton, everything else from the Moog.
Part 2 of a 3-part cycle of songs (49-51).
"Where did I go
Temperature flow
Barometer's low
Now it's starting to snow
Fly as high as a crow
On a wind that won't blow
I'm not on my own
And it's starting to show
In those darker times
In my old satellite
Your words felt so kind
Helped me sleep at night"
As promised, Jill helped me with some of the music on this one (thank you Jill!). This is also part one of a three-part cycle.
Overall, this song sounds really far away and underwater - which wasn't intentional, and doesn't sound good to me. Methinks I had too many delay, reverb etc. effects, which makes things sound further away. I have a harder time mixing strictly guitar sounds (of which there are three on this one: ebow, chords, and plucking, not to mention a bass guitar), which is why last week's song sounds so much better (no guitar in it at all, save for the bass). I can start to understand why guitar people spend so much time on their tone, now :)
"That was a darker time
Up until I met you
Robotic response in kind
Warmer than a virtue
These simple words at night
Helping you to pull through
Artificial as a satellite
No less of a world view"
Two different bass lines, a few lines on the Triton (including drums), and I decided to keep my demo vocals recorded earlier in the week instead of re-recording them.
As I approach the end of this project, it strikes me just how much effort I've been putting into these songs, and how glad I'll be to have the free time back. Between work, CGA courses, and a song a week, I can tell you that I really need a break (almost any vacation I've taken in the last two years has been to ramp up my studying for CGA courses, and most of my work on this project takes place over the weekend - specifically, late Saturday night into the early hours of Sunday morning. So, weekends haven't exactly been all that relaxing for me, either).
With that in mind, I'm going to try to make the last four songs of the project as easy on myself as I can. Jill's going to help me with 49-51, and I have the general notion that I want them all to be connected somehow. Whether I pull that off or not will remain to be seen.
52 itself will be a lot of fun - to celebrate the completion of the project, I plan to drink heavily and do the song in one session, and just see what kind of mess I come up with. Since one of the goals of this project has been to experiment, I see this as valid! ;)
"There's noone around me so
It leaves me free
To build this busstop, yeah
Where I will meet you there
Travelling
To far-off places
I'm already starting to
Lose my nerve
So I'll work quickly, yeah
Lay the foundations down
Put a cover on
My three-sided structure"
Motives this week:
- work a little more dry
- get it done quick. Exam in 9 days (!!!)
Consciously went with one vocal pass instead of doubling, in an effort to force a better vocal performance. Great for recording 'good' versions of songs, but takes forever just for making a demo. Unless you're a good singer.
(crickets chirp) :)
Anyway: I wrote these lyrics for a reason, which you will hopefully see in a couple of weeks. It was interesting writing with a goal in mind; I really enjoy limiting myself to spark creativity. With no limits, it's easy to get lost sometimes.
EDIT: Here's the reason I wrote these lyrics the way I did: a light-painting video!
Also worth mentioning! My original vision for this week was a slow, sensitive acoustic guitar song with some glockenspiel. I enjoy letting something change direction, if it wants to.
"I had a flashlight in my room
It lent wonder and warmth and it dispelled the gloom
I fell asleep with it on all night
So in the morning it would not light
Your eyes used to shine with that very same light
They gave colour and fear and a secret delight
But the power expired through a force I can't see
Now your eyes, they still shine, but they won't glow for me"
While not my favourite tune of the project, and there's still plenty of room for improvement, I think that this week's song represents a lot of growth for me. I have the lovely folks from the Middle Audio forums to thank for their comments and suggestions for things to try this week...these people are something akin to mystics when it comes to critically listening to music. They can divine quite a lot by communing with a piece of sound, and I'm grateful (and humbled!) that they would answer my call for help.
My focus this week wasn't so much on the tuneage, or even song structure (you'll notice it's a very simple, two-chord song); I more had things like dynamics, compression and eq in mind.
First of all, vocals: I tried standing up and givin'r (2nd part of the song), instead of sleepily sitting and singing (1st part). I recorded two takes, and panned both square in the middle (usually I pan about halfway left and halfway right, close to where the guitars are sitting at hard left and right). I also compressed the vocals harder than usual to try and get them to stand out better.
Dynamically, I was made aware of how 'loud' the last few tracks were. I peeled off some higher frequencies on the guitars, which I think helped. What also helped was finally finding the 'master mixer' panel in Cubase (face palm!), where I noticed the audio levels for the song happily going into the red. I dialed it down (a lot) and exported it into Cool Edit, where I could tell just by looking at the wav form that things would sound better this week (jagged, as opposed to friggin' SQUARE).
I normally have trouble hearing the bass guitar when I use it, so my bass hasn't made many appearances in this project. I was feeling pretty confident this week so I brought it in, and actually used my low B string just so I could try hearing the low, low frequencies. They're too loud in the first part, but sound a little better in the second.
In other news: bought a small, indoor faux-rock water fountain for a certain kitty this week who won't drink out of her water dish.
(photo by C.S. Graves)
"What I wanted was not you
If you would be honest you'd see it too
This awful revelation is not that bad
There's a harmonic resonation that drives the past
There's no more room for our pictures on your shelf
I don't have you but I have myself
I used to have some good friends - I'll reconnect
They can help me make it through what must come next"
There's a lump in your throat 'cause you're singing so foolish.
There. I said it.
This week's song: trying out new things, for me; the only other time I tried singing like this was for my metal sendup; I don't have satire to hide behind this time (although I'll understand if you disagree with that!).
I also finally found my ebow, and used it in two ways: as a pad, and as arpeggios, quickly moving vertically up and down the strings (you can particularly hear these near the end of the song).
Way too many different elements competing to be heard in this song, but I think I can at least say that I probably did a better job mixing than I would have if I tried this even 10 weeks ago. So that's something to be said, at least.
"This isn't working out like I hoped
Nobody laughed and nobody spoke
There was no fire, there was no smoke
File another night away
Quietly feeling out of place
What I fear has taken hold
Another evening wearing out the cold
If something warm would touch me
Perhaps I'd find it easier to breathe
I'll say it again
This isn't working out like I hoped
Nobody laughed and nobody spoke
There was no fire, there was no smoke
Tell me why is there a lump in my goddamned throat"
I usually have no trouble coming up with melodies for songs; this week, I just let myself go crazy coming up with new lines, to the point where I already had more than enough but just kept adding more and more. The Moog solo at the end is one of my favourite lines I've written (although that could change by tomorrow morning, who knows).
My problem with this song: it still follows my old habit of just writing a chorus, and extending it into a full song. Yes, you can tell there are different sections to this tune, but I'd still like to write sections that are a little more distinct from each other. Although I wonder - if I put more time into the drums, would I have the same complaint? What do you think?
Guitars are either too loud for the rest of the track, or need the high end rolled off. I had already put too much time into it to mess around much further.
The last two lines of lyrics: pun fully intended, I think I was digging around too much for an important-sounding metaphor. In my opinion, I came up short, although with the background vocals, I feel as though there's enough there that the music helps make the words seem more significant than they actually are.
Despite the impression I'm giving, I'm actually quite pleased with how this one turned out!
"And I know things have to change
And I know things have to end
Why can't it be the rain that disappears?
Why does it have to mean we can't still be friends?
I think I have to really push this time
'Cuz if I don't, I'm pulled in again
When the ground's full of so much rain
We must allow for saturated clay"
It's getting pretty close to Halloween, and I felt like youtubing Mad Monster Party, a children's stop-motion special made decades ago that I've heard lots of good things about, just to preview it a bit to see if I wanted to spend $10 and get it on dvd.
The very first comment on the video that I read started talking about "the idiot liberal agenda that says such characters are too violent" for kids today to be familiar with, suggesting that children today would be unfamiliar with such mainstays as The Mummy, Dracula, the Wolfman, etc.
People today are way too willing to fight. News media sources play a huge role in this; people like Glenn Beck exist strictly to piss people off. Because when people are happy, they don't say much. When people have an axe to grind - especially in today's internet age where everyone has a loud, anonymous voice - they talk about it: at work, at school, on message boards, and, yes, even in the comments section of clips from children's videos.
So as I say, the media has figured out that the easiest way to get people talking is to piss them off. Hopefully, all this talk takes place on said media's message boards, or the media source is mentioned during these angry conversations. Links are freely passed back and forth and advertised, so everyone else can read the article that got their friend so angry. The media gets ratings, page hits, etc, all good things they can show their advertisers.
The huge drawback to all this, of course, is that people are so riled up by this 'us vs. them' (left vs. right) dynamic that the media promotes, that noone is willing to work together towards the greater good. Noone is willing to compromise, or relent their position.
A common right-wing complaint is that the left has become far more intolerant of the ideas of the right, than the right is of the left. I can understand. Let's say someone tells you that segregation could maybe use another try; hopefully, that idea is offensive to you, and you would be intolerant of it. I think that's a natural reaction, and I think that's what's behind a lot of indignant reaction from any angry lefties.
The thing is, is that the right is not necessarily the bogeyman that wants segregation, racism, intolerance etc.
Take the issue of gay marriage, for example. The common generalization is that lefties are for it, righties are against it. Both sides feel quite strongly that their position is the right one. It doesn't take very much for a shouting match to happen over the issue.
The thing is, is that if people would stop yelling long enough, they might find that their positions on the issue are startlingly close. The problem that some people have is the idea of the government forcing churches to go against their beliefs and perform ceremonies they don't believe in. Seen from this angle, many lefties and righties could compromise, say, and only have gay marriages performed outside of the church, as well as by churches who are ok with it.
Obviously, this is an oversimplification of things. Still, hopefully it illustrates what I mean, and shows the idea that there are many other contentious issues that have a lot of potential middle ground.
Vegetarianism is another such issue, in my opinion. For something so simple as what a person decides to have for supper - a decision which affects only themselves - there has been a tremendous amount of anger, hatred, bad feelings and circular arguments generated out there. I find it extremely difficult to find a neutral voice on the internet about it; as a friend of mine put it recently, either you burn in hell for eating meat, or you're crazy for not eating it.
Now, as for my stance: I believe very strongly in not eating meat, that the nutrition I lose can be made up by eating a variety of certain foods, and that, simply put, if I can have a meal without something having to have died for it, then I'll have that meal. No big deal. However, screaming my righteous beliefs isn't going to change anyone's mind about it. And telling people who are curious about it propaganda-style exaggerations about how easy it is to start, also doesn't help (this is partly why I only lasted 6 months with it the first time I tried it out). Having a rational conversation about it, just might change an opinion. One patch of middle ground out there that's a good starting point for rational, non-accusatory discussion: free-range, as opposed to factory, farming.
Lately, whenever I see Stephen Harper's name brought up anywhere, there's such an immediate hostile and mean-spirited reaction from the left that it just makes me cringe. This is the same man who, I could be wrong about, was the first prime minister in Canada to finally issue an apology to Canada's First Nations: Click here
This actually details a little more reaction on the apology, and shows a touch of suspicion towards Harper still, just in case I'm appearing too biased here :)
At any rate, no matter the justification, I've never seen fighting and shouting change the way anyone thinks. And that long-winded, full-of-holes nonsense up there is what this week's lyrics (a mere 5 lines) are about :)
I am no kind of expert on politics, and am woefully underqualified to even write the above blog entry. I do feel, however, that we could get a lot further as a country if we could stop yelling at each other so much, and start working together. The current state of the two-party system seems like a tug-of-war, not the well-implemented three-legged race that it should be :)
If any of the above pisses you off: I'd like to think I'm still too young to get in real-life arguments over politics. And I don't think there's anything too outrageous in the basic message I'm trying to promote:
Ok, so music this week: not my best Dave Gahan impression, but that's still what I was going for. Also trying out tremolo picking (finger, I don't use picks) and hammer-ons. Whee. 9 more songs to go!!!!!!!!!
"We're opposition only in name
What we both want is roughly the same
So hold on tonight
Hold on tonight
We've been your enemy since you were a youth
We've pissed you off so long that you won't listen to truth
But hold on tonight
Hold on tonight"
I meant to start writing this week's song using the guitar, like I did for last week's song. However, I got my third keyboard stand back from some friends this week, who I wish the best of luck to in Toronto and in the future, as they're some of the most talented and creative (and plain friggin' nice!) people I've had the good fortune to play with. iSonic FTW!!!
Anyway, this all meant I could set up my Roland EG-101, which has a really fun arpeggiator on it. I think you can see where this went from there (you still don't hear the Roland this week, as I simply programmed the arpeggio pattern it helped me come up with into the QY-70, and then had that play the Moog for me).
I kept discovering fun noises on the Moog during the recording process, which is all that garble you hear at the start and end of the song.
"I lie awake at night
Remembering such good times
I'm planning more to come
Hope I don't fuck things up
The red is all I know
Once more you overflow
I like the way you fight
Teach me your moves so bright"
With proper production, I really believe this could be a good song! As it is, I'd like to think that it at least hints at its potential :)
The main motivation this week was to do something along the lines of Silversun Pickups and their 90's-revival loud/quiet/loud formula. Sure it's cliche, but, so is everything else I write; looked at in this way, this is a serious step up for me in terms of writing! I'd like to try more songs like this; it just feels a lot less flat than most of my other tunes.
What I still need to work on: creating different lines for different parts of the song. Despite the differences in volume, this one is still basically the same lines over and over again.
What the hell is going on with my voice this week? Well, since I was attempting to rip off Silversun Pickups so closely, I figured I might as well try ripping off their vocal style, too! I like the results, but I sure understand if noone else does :) (I even do a good scream like them, but it was pretty late when I did the vocals, so...bad idea!)
The synth was a last-minute addition, and it made the mix even muddier than the guitar-and-bass-only version, so I count the official '41' to be the one without any Moog on it. The organ-sounding line is repeating the actual bass line, just to try and help it stand out better. The lead synth line was just sooooo much fun to play! I got to use my pitch wheel and my mod wheel!
Lyrically, nothing is going on here, but I like that the music tricks me into thinking they're somehow significant :)
Also this week: zomgNylaissocuteandshessuchasweetkittyilovehersomuchzomg!!!<3<3<3
"We're not falling down
You can push
And you can bite
You can even kill
But we won't fight
In a parking lot
That you forgot
We fucked up a lot
But we won't fight
Sorry for writing a song that I know you'll think is making fun of you. It's not. I had the best intentions - write a nice, ballsy metal song. The guitar fell into place easy enough, I thought.
The problem came when I used a preset pattern on the QY-70 as a placer for my rhythm track. All of a sudden, the song became industrial. I'd also been thinking about Trailer Park Boys a lot, especially Ricky always saying he wants to get drunk as fuck. That made me want to call the song "Metal As Fuck."
Things just kind of deteriorated from there.
Sincerely,
-Christian
P.S. Recording notes: I used a bunch of reverb on the guitar to try and thicken it up. Next time I try something like this, I think I'll try something I read about using delay, instead.
I normally would never use a pre-set pattern in any of my songs, but I just got used to how this one sounded. No big deal.
Also worth noting: the ColdPlay slag is fairly obvious, the U2 and Bono ones I maybe have to point out. "Morning comes too soon and from behind" is one of the weirdest double entendres I've ever written. "Fill your mouth with metal" = verrrry greasy!!!
"This handjob is for losers
It's just cold play in your trousers
You too must cast off wankers
And fuck the boner in your tangas
In the night we ride what you've been denied We're metal as fuck!
Morning comes too soon and from behind We're metal as fuck!
Cease your rapping, please shut up, my precious petal, We're metal as fuck!
If you must sing, let's have you fill your mouth with metal We're metal as fuck!"
Originally, every melody in this song was on guitar. This meant lots of static when it played back, despite my best efforts at equalization. So, I replaced two lines with my QY-70, sang another line, and left the last one alone. You can still hear some static when the guitar melody plays alongside the guitar chords. Anyone feel like giving me some tips on how to avoid that?
"You've been away now
I've been away too It always works out
I don't know that's true
If I can't take it
If I can't make it
I'll at least face it
Until it makes sense
Maybe I'll win
And see you again
Or maybe you'll win
And you won't hear from me again"
Update: I made a music video for this song! Simple travel footage, from going to meet the Allreds last week, but at least it sort of commemorates the 3/4 completion point!
Speed record! This one took me half of a lunch hour, and then another half hour later that night.
And it SHOWS! :)
(EDIT: Crom's balls, this one is rank! Sorry project, sorry anyone who listened to this!)
Why the rush? Busy week! Jill and I are going to Montreal this weekend to the Montreal Comic Con to meet my comic book hero, Mike Allred. There's also a CGA assignment due a few days after I get back, so I wanted to get most of that done first. And also also, I was approached about joining a band two weeks ago. One and a half practices later, I joined up and played my first show with them, in Fredericton. So practicing my parts at home was taking up a little time too :)
"This one's a song
That acknowledges how
One day I'll be gone
Bring it on bring it on bring it on
I'm accumulating songs
as fast as these wrongs
like this growth that's on my shoulder
Already feel colder
Like this numbness in my leg
Or click in the joint of my thumb
Each year I grow another ring
Like ripples that go they're going and going
But they don't 'cus they stop
And maybe I just thought
If I could write something strong enough
That I could be remembered by
I have two favourite poets. One Canadian (actually, he lived a few blocks away from where I grew up), and one American. Alden Nowlan, and then Alden Nowlan's US counterpart (imho), Hayden Carruth (who, I just learned this morning, passed away almost a year ago at age 87. The write-up here serves as a good introduction to him). To be honest, I only have the one book of poetry by him, "Scrambled Eggs and Whiskey" (whose title, I'm happy to say, I tried out one time while celebrating with some friends one morning), but it's one I really enjoy, and for the same reasons I enjoy Alden Nowlan's poems.
Carruth's poem "The Brook" is reproduced here in its entirety; just scroll a little bit down until you see it. In it, he's just describing the sounds of a brook and how he likes how unconnected it is from humanity's touch; the sounds it makes, its meaning (or lack thereof); you can just lose yourself in all of it. I always liked thinking of that poem in terms of experimental electronic music, which I guess fits if you start throwing buzz-words like 'organic' around. Here's pretty much most of the poem right here, from the book "Scrambled Eggs and Whiskey":
"A music extraordinarily variable.
Each passage of water against its stone
sounding a different pitch and rhythm."
"...syllables
of unknown meaning, notes on an
unknown scale..."
"...Without art, the song was perfectly
artistic. The unmeaning music
and the unknowing listener were one
in the loneliness of those distant
late summer nights in Vermont.
Truly the music meant nothing,
no intimation, which was why
I liked it so much, my brook
murmuring all night in the darkness,
and I meant nothing, and I liked that too."
This week's song just happened all in one session, last night. I've been hanging out with too many creative (CREON) people (scroll down to RoB Patey) lately not to do a little experimenting of my own (experimenting, for me, means paths well-trodden by others...an apology that needs only be made for these styles of music, I think).
The wonkiness is from me playing with the sample and hold LFO on my Voyager, and the organ and other melodies are coming from the Triton. I don't usually play chords, but I got some high 7ths and low 5ths going on (...maybe? I think?).
And while this song is quite long in terms of this project, it's still much shorter than it could have been; I could probably just listen to, and tweak, that sample and hold bit for hours. I really liked the randomness of it, which is why I linked to that Hayden Carruth poem above.
As always, comments are welcomed and invited. Is this tune too self-indulgent? Too melodic? Too sloppy? Too unlistenable? Should I have tried going wonkier with it? Or getting jiggy? A beat of some kind? I'm open to anything, here. Let me know!
Just so nobody worries: as far as I can tell, my exam last Thursday went ok, so the use of the word 'suicide' in this week's tune is not a cry for help :)
As a matter of fact, I have to confess that this feels like one of the least personal songs I've ever written, lyric-wise. Which might be ironic, given the weepy-weep nature of the words. I'm not saying that to trash it, just to point out that lyrically, everything seems really 'open' and 'generic.' Which could mean that anyone listening could have it apply to them?
"This was mine: too many cold, cold nights
Over time until I thought I'd die
This alienation and resignation was not alright
Invalidation and indignation made me feel uptight
Trapped in ice, you broke me out in time
I hope you realize you really saved a life
Invalidation and alienation makes me cry
Through your invention, you showed me ways that it would be alright
Confrontation, intimidation in a hostile time
Through adaptation, you helped defuse a living suicide
Invalidation and indignation made me feel uptight
Through your invention, you showed me ways that it would be alright"
Boy am I tired. I wonder if that had anything to do with the lyrics this week (hint: YES).
Would like to have added, oh, I dunno, DRUMS this week, but I had a CGA project due Friday, and I have a CGA exam coming up this Thursday. So, I'm fine with it as it is :) (That's also my excuse for singing the same lyrics twice)
Production details: other than the bass drum, did everything on the Moog this week. The main buzzy synth was whipped up from scratch, and the higher-pitched line was a tweaking of a preset. So, I'm starting to get a bit better at coming up with sounds on my own, I think?
Also of note: again, other than the bass drum, I played everything live into the computer, no programming. I'm not sure if you know, but there are some electronic bands who will say in the liner notes, or maybe even on the back of the album, that they played everything live, no programming.
I know they're just trying to explain that they know how to play an instrument, but to me, it just seems like bragging about not knowing how to do something. In terms of listening to a pre-recorded track, I don't care if something was played live, or if everything was programmed, or cut and pasted to great lengths, whatever. So long as it sounds good. Feel free to comment if you agree/disagree.
"No more instance of idle eyes here
Never rest like it used to be
After a while you must get tired, dear
Close your head and count to sleep
In a minute we will retire here
Sixty seconds until we're free
Until that moment we'll pass the time here
Killing time quite recklessly"
I tried using a deep voice early on in the project, but I think that this sounds a lot more natural (although I fear it still has a touch of 'girl comedian talking in a deep voice for humourous effect' going on). I don't know the difference between a bass singer and a baritone, but I've always loved the voices of singers like Brad Roberts (Crash Test Dummies), Elijah Allman (Deadsy) and now, thanks to Coco's influence, Stephin Merritt (The Magnetic Fields).
Lyrically, I really like dropping 'sudoku' out of nowhere. Not only does it keep this song from being 'same old same old' outta me, but it also helps trivialize problems a little bit, if you choose to read it that way. For some people, lots of seemingly important problems are trivial; it might not feel that way when you're tightly wrapped up in them, but they really are.
Otherwise, I think the rest of the song (the 'pep talk') was influenced by Kat's comments last week about why people create music - thanks Kat!
Which seems like a pretty good segue, if you ask me ;)
I think there are about 3 big, possibly interconnected, reasons why I make music: drive, esteem, connection.
Drive: you know that feeling you get when you've been working seemingly forever without a break, and all you do when you get home is chores? I get a touch of that feeling when I've gone too long without making music. Regardless of whether things in my life are going great at the time, or not so great. That desire, that drive, does well up on its own, and giving in to it just starts the endorphins a-flowin'. After reading that article I linked to last week, I suspect that some of this drive is also satisfied from playing games like Rock Band - but now we're drifting into 'playing' vs. 'creating' (and while I think that creating can satisfy the playing urge, and vice-versa, it's an exploration I'm not that interested in at the moment).
Esteem: I believe this is a big one for me, and I'm sure that it must at least partially feed into Drive.
When I played music live with Jill as Kitty Smack, I got a huge ego boost from feeling like I was living a secret life, like I had an alternate ego - like a superhero. If life or work seemed dull, I could always glean some satisfaction from feeling like I was part of something underground and cool, that I had a whole creative aspect in my secret world. Having grown up identifying myself as a nerd, having fantasies of self-esteem through comic books and music is a fairly routine process, I think. A comfort thing.
I think music-making also used to be a substitution for other things I couldn't have. I never really dreamed about playing huge stadiums, but when I was younger, I did use to fantasize that someday, somewhere, young lovers would be young loving to my music. Not to inspire it, but just to be in the background. Weird, I know, but it was a big thing for a long time; I think I was associating music with 'living,' the way young, romantic, inspired people do.
And another reason: I'd be lying if I said I didn't like attention :)
Connection: not as strong as the previous two, but connected a bit with esteem, I think. If something's bothering me and I manage to express it in a song, I like if someone's able to tell me they've felt that way too. Just nice to make a connection.
Another one I just thought of, that goes along with this: to make someone cry. That'd be awesome. No, really. I mean it. Call it sadistic if you like, I'll own up to it. Yeah. Cry real tears.
Now, there may be a 4th option here, as well, only I think it's connected with the three above: legacy. I'm not really scared of dying, so much as I'm scared of being forgotten. That part bothers me. Part of me thinks that if I leave enough music behind me, then part of me will still exist into the future, and people will care about who I was.
Which is pretty futile, when you think about it. How many young people these days don't even know who David Bowie is any more? And that's with fame already attached. Me, I can make a bunch of mp3's, give them away on the internet for a little while. A few people download them. After I'm gone, those songs will eventually get cleaned off of whatever servers they were on, and then that'll be it. No trace of me. My only hope would be some CBC Music Archives project or something, at best.
And any form of recognition during your time, even! I'm grateful that home recording has become such that almost anyone can do it. But that makes it that much harder for anything to stand out, too :) In popular music these days, try thinking of an 'idol' act like there used to be. Where's the modern-day equivalent of The Rolling Stones, a Morrissey, a Bob Dylan, a Madonna, a Radiohead? Bands like Death Cab for Cutie, or Deadsy, or The Birthday Massacre, or The Postal Service are larger-than-life icons for me, but chances are, they mean very little to you - simply because you have your own idols, separate than mine.
(heh...remember what I said at the beginning about seemingly important problems being trivial? This is probably a good example ;)
"Loss and pain are here to be with you again.
You will find these trials grow bigger in your mind.
Inflating
Expanding
Engrossing
Demanding
Like an expert
Sudoku
Work through it
I know you
Can."
There was a wind noise effect on the Moog called "Windy Night," which I played around with and named "Windy Light." Complex, I know. How do these artistic types do it.
I recorded the melody as a rough demo a while back, and Tuesday morning, went to add drums to it. My normal habit of 'bass and snare' followed by a constant hi-hat wasn't working out for me, so it forced me to try something new. I ended up using 4 different tracks on the QY-70 for the drums, each doing a different bit. I then added a phaser to it, which I think makes it sound a lot more interesting. It's an approach I'd like to try more in the future...especially turning one track off, then back on and turn another off, etc (a tiny bit of what I mean happens at the end of the song, when the programming reaches its end).
I'd like to share two links with you that I've found while browsing around the internet. The first is an interview with Daniel Clowes, who at some point talks about the effect of cartoonists spending so much of their time isolated at a drawing board: click here (via neilalien).
The other link is a longer article talking about the upcoming Beatles Rock Band game. There are some very interesting thoughts in there about a universal desire to create music, as well as reasons why Rock Band and Guitar Hero players get so much flak from some people: click here (via Robert W. Getz).
The reason I include these is that, due to a project like this, I'm forced more than ever to examine why it is that I make music. I know I have a strong drive to do so, but I don't quite completely understand it. Daniel Clowes cartoons as a way of making sense of the world; while lyrics can help with that sometimes, writing music does not do that for me. Yet I will still happily isolate myself to work on songs, mixes, etc.
There are a lot of famous musicians that, in their interviews, always say something along the lines of "if this wasn't my career, I would still be doing this for free" (similar quotes are attributed to actors, painters, writers, cartoonists, etc). I like to flatter myself into thinking I'm the other side of that coin, the proof of an idle claim.
But as to why? While it's tempting to say something romantic like "Because We Must!", I'm being serious. At any rate, it's something for another post. But in the meantime, I'd be pleased to hear from anyone, musician or non-, with any insights of their own (that is: PLEASE COMMENT!).
I kind of see this song taking place from a girl's point of view for some reason, even though the notions of regret and the delusional idea that the grass is always greener on the other side are not gender specific. Nevertheless, I almost see a Veruca Salt style of singing (particularly their cover of Depeche Mode's "Somebody").
I also originally thought a piano line would be the main part of the music, but once I had the chords, I stumbled onto this voice on the Triton, and liked it this way a whole lot better. Reminds me of the music for an old background site from The Birthday Massacre for some reason: http://www.nothingandnowhere.com
"That smile could have been mine
That fire should have been mine
These pictures could have been mine
What was someone else's should have been mine
We don't foresee these regrets at the time
There's plenty standing in line There's problems more serious than mine
Yeah, I'll keep that notion in mind"
I originally thought of the tune for 27 as a rock song with guitars, but since I was in the middle of moving, ended up exhaustedly recording it with the QY-70 instead.
Today I set up my old Boss pedals again (3 distortions, flange, tremelo, and a digital delay), and happily re-recorded the tune (even vocals).
Drums: I just didn't feel like programming them, so I did them 'live' (one pass on the QY with drum and bass, another pass with cymbals...I eq'd the cymbals a bit on the low end and added reverb because as they were, they sounded really thin).
Maybe I went a little too ape-shit with the distortion. But I haven't had that much fun with my guitar in years :)
Wow! First and foremost, thanks to Gary Flanagan for lending me his vocals this week!
This song started with a bass line, then the drums. The lyrics came to me all in one go last Sunday evening towards the end of a studying session (even though I had forgotten the tune by that point). I recorded a set of vocals that night to remind me how I wanted it to sound.
Monday morning before work, I made an mp3 of what I had and emailed it to Gary, with my request. I had his vocals by Tuesday morning, so I added the other musical elements you hear, and re-recorded my vocals (the originals are doubling the "these are the losers" bit).
My cousin had just gotten me to listen to some Crucifucks, so Doc Dart was kind of influencing my delivery. My cousin would probably cringe to know that :)
The lyrics themselves stem from a conversation I had with Corey, and touches on the potential social awkwardness of lyric-writing - the fine line between catharsis and obsessiveness. Some bands can get away with it, some can't.
Now, this example doesn't quite illustrate what I'm getting at, but it's close enough for now. Take Blue October. "She's My Ride Home" uses violent imagery in a poetic, beautiful way. "The End," on the other hand, leaves you with a very different feeling. If you think the song works, you might feel disturbed. Me, I'm taken too far outside the song, distracted by thoughts of "wow, this guy's pathetic, and probably watches Pulp Fiction and Natural Born Killers way too much. Maybe he's dangerous to himself, but I think he needs to get a life."
From the same conversation, I was also trying to reduce the number of times I use words like 'I, me, my, mine, and you' in my songs for the next little while.
So anyway, I kinda like how this one turned out, which is why I finished it up a few days early :) (plus, that frees up my weekend nicely!)
(Also worth noting: while the delivery and lyrics make the 'speaker' sound a little bitter and jealous, my intention when I sat down to write was to be sincere. The song had other ideas, I guss :)
"I respect that other bands
can sing of murder, hate and dark
and make it sound all fantasy,
cool pretend and future art.
They mix it with a flippancy,
humourous and self-aware
forcing listeners to know
the artists don't sincerely care
These are the cool kids.
These kids have friends.
They're not obsessed, they're just
playing pretend.
Their prozak's a placebo
and it goes down so nice
I bought their single twice.
But then there's that band that just
frets in the corner.
Their sickness, unfiltered,
all too-obvious warning
They think noone's watching
want so much attention
We don't like to hear
it's just awkward to mention
These are the losers
They have less friends.
Always obsessed, they just cannot pretend.
Their prozak's not working
But goes down so nice.
I listened to their download twice.
These are the cool kids.
These kids have friends.
They're not obsessed, they're just
playing pretend.
Their prozak's a placebo
and it goes down so nice
I bought their single twice."
Weird tack this week: very very busy at work (again), as well as really starting to get back into my CGA studying, which will get intense over August. With that in mind, I've started working ahead for the first time in this project; the bass line for "31" is already programmed (if not recorded), and "32" is just about finished - just needs some lyrics written and a guitar melody strengthened with some synth doubling the line. Somewhere in all this, I skimped on this week's song, but, it wasn't really going anywhere anyway. Think of music as drawing: as far as sketches go, this one's some doodles done while talking on the phone.
I kinda like that sometimes, though. More instinctive, more random. More earnest, because if nothing's expected of it, it doesn't have to conform to expectations. (Heh! Are you buying any of this? :)
Anyway: this one was done with the QY-70 for the bass drum line, my 6-string bass for the 3 bass lines you hear during the tune, and the Moog for the electronic noodling and final bits and pieces. A tired man tried singing the vocals.
...Here's a thought for you: some people refer to rainbows at night as "moonbows." I wouldn't, because I wouldn't call rainbows during the day "sunbows" or even "daybows."
Had a leisurely time writing this one. Used the Triton, controlled by the QY-70, and wrote this over one evening and several mornings. The first line of the song came to me with the initial push of music, and I finally wrote the rest of it after watching "The Towering Inferno" with Jill.
I should point out that line 2 was inspired by some graffiti I saw 9 years ago on the C-Train in Calgary: "Your only crime is the one against us." Here's hoping I'm not accidentally making some kind of racist reference!
Also of note: I threw some gain in around 5000 khz on the vocals, for presence (to unmuddle them a bit). You see, in my new studio, I actually have access to my music books, including the highly-recommended-by-me "Mixing Engineer's Handbook" by Bobby Owsinski.
"Yes this is time, come get some time of your life
Your only crime is the one made against us in life
Don't fear the grime, cleanliness sharpens the knife
Yes this is time, come get some time of your life"
(note: it's supposed to sound like a record scratching, but now all I can hear is a really cool duck)
There's something to be said about celebrity personas that are just entertaining for being themselves. Years ago, I caught an Orange Glo commercial on dvd+r as I was recording a Cure performance on tv, and I'm glad I did. Here, check out these outtakes to see what I mean:
Anyway: my intent this week was to experiment more with drums. I did, you can't tell. But, at least this is one of the first times I came up with the drums first for a song, and then the music.
Also of note: had several instruments going into the same amp, so I could actually come up with lines on the Moog while playing along to the QY-70, which made the songwriting process a little more 'natural.'
"There's a smile just like a gun
It's gonna shatter Crystal
If you want the rain to come
You gotta shoot your pistol
Everybody run and hide,
'cus this ain't lookin' nice
The showdown starts tonight
It's lookin' like they just might
Make out in the dark
No wait - that's a different tale
It's cloudy, it's a start
Oh wow! "Wow, a yard sale!"
The forecast for today
calls for intermittent drizzle
So hide your bullets all away
All up in this hizzle"
Came up with the vocal melody for this one first, and then thought up some guitar chords to accompany the vocals. But, since Jill and I just moved into our new townhouse and are currently in the midst of unpacking, I had to instead turn to my old friend, the QY-70, to see me through another week :)
So, kind of went on auto-pilot for this week's song - meaning, I didn't really try anything new or different. Actually, the approach to this song was in reaction to song 25: keep things simple. With all the packing, working, moving, and unpacking that's been going on, this was a good week to go the simple route.
Listening again now, I can tell that my focus was on song structure, more so than melody - or a clean vocal take! ;)
"When does black turn to grey?
When does this start to be ok?
Because I've seen that side
And I think you could provide
Never thought
This could be
Something closer now than never used to seem
Well I still
Constantly miss
What you do, would you consider trying this
That's when black turns to grey
That's when this starts to feel ok
I really want to see this side
And I think that you will find
Despite the years and the miles
What's worth taking takes a while
The morning air with you
That's when grey starts turning blue"
Felt bad about last week's song, so I retreated back to the QY-70 to make something tuneful :)
Would have liked to have polished this a lot better, but, this project is all about demos, after all.
Also, between moving on July 1st and 2nd, and work keeping me at the office all weekend, I don't exactly have the time to do anything more with this (not even to add vocals). My initial session making this week's song turned out to be my final one. So there you are: a snapshot of my creative process!
And, oh hey: did I mention that this marks the half-way point for this project? :D
My intent: introduce my Moog to my guitar, and see how they got along.
What went wrong: my Moog was feeling full of itself, and in two simple patches, tried taking over the whole damn song. What you hear are the two instruments having an awful, terrible fight.
Contributing factors: exhaustion. Even though I got an early start with the guitar track, I didn't start doing anything else for it until the night before this was 'due.' The lyrics, written at the same time, reflect this exhaustion in their "wtf?!"-itude.
Why it didn't mix better: I think the guitar and the bass patch just sounded so similar to each other that they bleed into one another. Panning and eq weren't doing anything for me (although mixing while being tired is supposed to be a big no-no).
My final word: lesson (hopefully!) learned. Use sounds that don't interfere with each other so much. Or, study eq better, its limitations, etc.
If you could: give me a tip or two on how to avoid results like these :) Is there something very basic I'm missing? Probably so.
"Try something that I said
Fly over to my head
Inside it's black and its dark red
Don't hide 'cus this time we shake dread"
And thus concludes the Moog Trilogy! (?! Yes, I'm making that up)
Used the Moog on everything for this tune, except for the drums. The results? Even though there's not that many different tracks happening, it sounds very buzzy and cluttered, to my ears. I did my best to sort of separate the tracks from each other, but in the end, I only want to spend so much time on these each week :)
Had to double the vocals to try and get them to stand out better.
I think this week's tune was more of a conscious effort to write two different sections of a song (my weakness has always been to just write a chorus, with little else!); a reaction to last week's tune, I think.
I think the reason I was hard on last week's song was that I tend to use the same sets of notes for most of my songs; I should do a bit more investigation into different scales to play in, and see how that affects my output.
"What if I could say
Time's not set in place
There's motion in the sway
If you could travel now
Would you wipe me out
Would you change today?
Came up with a melody on my way in to work earlier in the week, so I phoned home and sang it into my answering machine so I could remember it later. Happily, the result isn't as goofy as the answering machine message :)
Learned that with an analogue synth, tuning can be an issue, so I tried to keep that in mind this go-around. The QY-70 is providing drums, and the final two synth sounds that appear (one during the 2nd verse, and one during the outro). Roger is doing everything else.
If you wouldn't mind answering this question to help me out: what's missing from this song? What do you suggest changing to make it more - I don't know, relevant? Distinctive? To me, it sounds pretty generic, forgettable...but maybe it's only because I feel like I've written this song over and over already? I was really pleased with last week's song, but this doesn't really seem to do anything. Feedback please! :) Or slip me some suggestions I can try out in coming weeks?
"And I realize far too late - it doesn't matter
And these feelings I can't take - they're getting better
And it's shocking me awake - because I never
Tried to heal it all away"
The drums and piano line come from the QY-70, while I'm happy to say that everything else you hear (other than vocals) is coming from my new friend:
(Minimoog Voyager Select Series)
Essentially my tax refund, "Roger" (?) arrived on Wednesday. One you thing you can't tell by listening is just how HEAVY this thing is! 42 lbs on its own, and the hard case it came with adds another 22 lbs; it was not a good day for the elevator in my apartment building to break down o_O
The voice used for the bass line, to me, doesn't quite fit with the rest of the music. But you try finding a preset called "Dr. Who Bass" and not forcing it into the first thing you do. Go on. Just try it, I dare ya. Can't be done. Srsly.
This song is for Jill.
"All I want is next to me
Immediate and warm and clean
Save your fire and gasoline
This time I'm killing apathy
All I want is next to me and clean"
I made two versions: one normal, and one tuned down real low, just for fun.
EDIT: just wanted to point out that I still really like the music on this one, but I'm right ashamed of myself lyrically though. It's alright, though, because I was experimenting at least :)
"I’d like to take a moment now
and talk about Hyperion
Eighth largest moon of Saturn
was found by Bill Bond and his son
No life, but has hydrocarbons
Dry and wet ice contained therein
Low gravity, chaotic spin
I feel Hyperionian
I feel Hyperionian"
o_O .....seriously, I should upload an instrumental version and put these monstrosities out of my misery :)
Dug out the ol' Triton LE for this week's tune, and used the QY-70 to control it. The drums, computer voice and the lead line come from the Triton, and the bass line comes from the QY-70.
The main intent this week was just to re-acquaint myself with the QY-70 controlling the Triton. Next week, hopefully I'll have figured out better how to control it channel by channel. As it was, I happened into this song kind of randomly: I was controlling a piano ballad combination sound that just happened to have a drum set as part of the sound, and where the kick and snare would usually have been on the QY, is where the computery-voice was instead.
I told my vocalist I didn't want his whiny, self-pitying lyrics bringing the party down this week (see: "19", for example). He tried something anyway, but no. Not this time ;)
